“You should do something you love and that suits who you are!”
Even though these were words I would proudly tell everyone around me, two years ago I – once
again – came to the realisation I was not living up to them myself. After starting a new job, I quickly
felt that the work I was doing was draining me. Although I was working with a great group of people,
my fear of failure and perfectionism went through the roof. The bar I had set for myself was
unattainably high and I felt I needed to be able to do all of it on my own. I struggled a lot more with
finishing tasks than other people, and within 3 months I felt completely stuck.
Once again, it was time to ask for help. I’d always felt I might have ADHD, but the referral I asked for
years ago was rejected, and I was instead advised to take part in an online course called ‘dealing with
emotions’. I didn’t feel heard or seen at all.
they also found out I had a generalised anxiety disorder.
The diagnosis was such a relief! After so many years of rejecting myself, I now knew and felt: it
wasn’t my fault. For 10 years I had been looking for answers to questions as: Why am I so sensitive
and insecure? Where does this fear of failure come from? Why does everything cost me so much
energy? Apart from occasionally seeking the help of professionals, I, being a social worker myself, felt
I had enough experience and knowledge to resolve these problems on my own. Yet, time after time, I
kept falling back into old habits and patterns and remained unable to control my emotions.
needed! Once you’ve admitted you need help, it only makes sense you´d want the best possible help
you can get. Most of all: you´d want to see improvements. Unfortunately, the help I received was
quite disappointing. The conversations I had with professionals didn’t really lead to anything, so I
decided to take action myself.
I asked myself the questions: What is ADHD exactly? Which types of counselling would be most
beneficial to people with ADHD? While doing some research, I quickly discovered a therapy called
RTT® (Rapid Transformational Therapy). The more I learned about this therapy, the more I started to
realise that this could be the answer I was looking for!
Today it’s been almost 2 years since my diagnosis and I’m proud to say I’ve started my online
practice, working as an ADHD therapist for women. I’m taking on challenges that I wouldn’t have
been able to take on before. After years of being afraid to completely be myself, years of not being
able to express my opinion or communicate my needs, everything turned around when I found a
therapy that fit me like a glove. I’m proud of myself for taking the steps I needed to take to walk
closer towards myself.
Nowadays, I look forward to each day in which I can help other women with ADHD improve their
lives. I’m finally able to live up to the words I would so proudly tell the people around me.
IF YOU REALLY KNEW ME,
YOU’D KNOW THAT:
- I know sign language and would definitely teach it to my future children – if I am fortunate enough to have them. It’s been said that before children learn how to talk, they can communicate through signs.
- I failed my driver’s exam 5 times, due to my persistent fear of failure. Nearly 10 years after that, I drove through the mountains of Laos on a motorbike, after only a 30-minute driving lesson. Although I lay awake in bed the night before, I bought a motorbike the next day and set off to one of the scariest, but most rewarding adventures of my life!
- I love cooking and baking, and – according to others – I’m quite a capable chef.
- I left the busy city life of the ‘student city’ Groningen 2 years ago in exchange for the peace and quiet of Emmen, where I live with my partner, and my dog, Audi. Living here allows me to escape the hustle and bustle of city life, even though I can still enjoy it from time to time.
- I´ve often said I´d love to move away to a warmer country to chase the sun! It’s been a ‘secret’ dream of mine that I hope to fulfil one day.
MY PERSPECTIVE
ADHD is not a limitation that you carry around for the rest of your life. The biggest burdens you carry are the beliefs shaped by your emotional history. By recognizing and processing this, you can create space for new thoughts, feelings and actions; you create space for a new belief system. This allows you to fully be yourself, instead of trying to live up to the expectations of the outside world.
I also grant you a life of peace.
A life with more energy, fun, and self-confidence!
Do you allow yourself this too? And do you think I can help you with this?
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